2 years in the making

It did not take two years to plan the Men's conference tonight. It took two years for God to move me in a position to lead tonight. I have 5 kids and a beautiful bride I adore and I have been apart of a lot of great moments. This is by far as an individual man the most amazing night of my life. I am writing this at 9am because of a few reasons.

I am on a 3 day fast and it has been amazing. At 9am the fast is in it's 60th hour. That is 2 1/2 days of no food. Just water and 100% pure apple juice to keep my blood sugar level. I never thought I could do it but it has been such an incredible time with God, now I can't wait to do it again. I am reading more of His word and more focused than ever before.

I went to Pastor John Atkinson about 2 years ago and asked if there was a Men's group at the church I could join. He said yes and the good news is you are leading it. I had no experience leading a Men's group and no real friends at the church to invite to start one. I did however have all the experience in the world being a man who was lukewarm in my faith and service to God. I made a few calls and sent a few emails and next thing you know Hans shows up. He was one of only a few guys that came. Hans stayed but most of the guys I would see maybe 2-3 times and then never again.

Shortly after that I came up with the name for the ministry. Well actually my bride came up with it but did not charge me to use it. She thought since it was the Men of Bay Area Fellowship it should be called the MoB. So I floated the name around and everyone loved it except for a couple of mean old ladies that sent hateful email about being associated with a criminal element.

So we floundered around for a few months and then a few other leaders stepped up and I started a second group led by Scott Walker. For a year or more we begged and pleaded for the church to do something to make the MoB grow and become effective. Like a great leader, Pastor John refused to hand me a ministry already built and easy to lead. He pushed me and encouraged me and even sometimes made me angry, but it was all to allow God to work in me so I could lead.

I rarely understood his methods or thinking but because I totally and completely trust him I was patient. He put up with the whining and complaining. He celebrated the highs and the lows. He did everything a great leader is supposed to do and didn't do the things a great leader should never do in life. The one thing he did that made all the difference is he let me want to quit but he never let me quit.

The third reason I am writing this now is because no matter what happens tonight it already is a huge success. God has brought me to this point and allowed me to see Men's lives changed on a scale I could never have imagined before now. This day is so huge for me I can not put it into words. If I totally blow my talk tonight that is cool. If the lights don't work or the chairs are too few, that is cool. God has already moved in my life to such and extent that a total and complete failure tonight will not change the fact men have been changed because I said yes to His calling. There is no way for this to fail in other words because I am a better husband, father, brother, son and friend because I said yes. Was a majority of the 2 years very hard and painful? YES! Did I want to quit at least 700 times? YES!

The difference between success and failure is always getting back up one more time. You can only fail if you quit. I told God yes and I don't care what the question is because my answer is not going to change.